NZH's daily anti-US whinge

I'm beginning to think the Herald doesn't like the American president very much. (Call it a "hunch", y'know us Maoris being all spiritual and that)

Showing admiral non-partisanship and willingness to air both sides of a debate, Reuters asks both Democrats AND Republicans to moan about Plamegate and how awful Rove and Cheney are.
In the RED corner - Trent Lott, Lindsey Graham
In the BLUE corner - Harry Reid, Charles Schumer
Tiresome stuff. Strictly for the fans.
Rating: No stars.

Desperately seeking bad cop stories

Lest you forget...
A new week, a new round of bad-mouthing the police. The NZ Herald reminds us of the deplorable state of kiwi cops, citing one economist's harrowing ordeal of having his car broken into, and a wife's rib broken after being hit by a drunk driver. Mr Rankin is distraught Auckland police have Victimised him by attending more urgent matters.

Uncle Tim Wants You!
An urgent appeal to all kiwis outraged by our hopelessly incompetent cops. Please contact Mr Murphy at chief_nasty@auckland'sCrappyDaily.co.nz.
He NEEDS your hard-luck stories NOW! A change in editorial policy means all journalists are now required to actually speak to people before quoting them. Anonymous, unreliable or fictitious sources should email J_Manukia@busted.co.nz or phone 0800-LIAR

"Happy Halloween, PC fruit-cakes!"

New Zealander of the Century
Wayne "THE ERADICATOR" Mapp
Prime Minister (2006 - as long as he wants)

John Manukia said...

Trawling through the Dark Side, look who popped up? 'Prominent' msm journo warns of a(nother) Methodist schism over elevation of lesbian Minister to church leadership. At least according to his interview transcript, so it MUST be true! Te Taha Maori ( the tangata whenua arm of the church - who knew they had one?) could not be reached for an interview. Yeah, so what's the problem? What did TTM really say, John? C'mon, you remember. Quote away, John, we trust ya.
Btw, re gay ministers: Ick.

Damage control... Battling to rehabilitate the msm's shattered credibility, the SST extols HoS editor's Herculean efforts to bleach the paper's JM stain. A suspicious Mr Currie went to John's parent's house & hired private eyes to investigate Mr Manukia (a Methodist, btw) when a routine cop-trashing assignment began to derail. Contractual obligations prevent JM from yacking to the SST. Umm, HELLO? Have we not learned anything from the entire episode? Interviews aren't strictly necessary. Ask John.

Like attracts like... Turns out our favourite Tongan fabulist was real chummy with Tim Murphy while working for the Dark Side. Tim is now the Herald's editor. I bet he taught John everything he knows :-)

where's the remote?

Why don't I watch TV One's 6pm bulletin anymore? Let me count the ways...

cutesy dog stories... stories about wine festivals & fashion shows bore the crap outta me (unless there's violence or mayhem involved)... constant recitation of Labour Party talking points... the beatification of St Helen Elizabeth... asking Joe-on-the-street (fer goodness sake!) to opine on important, topical matters requiring specialist commentary... referring to cold-blooded Islamic homicidal maniacs as "militants" - they even labeled them "activists" once, after one particularly brutal killing spree in Nigeria... watching a beaming Wendy wax delirious lauding our "historic" civil union bill the day it passed THEN the sight of two geezers kissing (lifelong mental scarring) when bill became law... they got rid of Holmes - our best TV "entertainer" ever, IMHO... Susan Vanilla Woods follows - 90 minutes of sappy, white, saccharine women is bad for the diabetes... the endless slandering of President Bush... importing ABC, CBS, CNN clips from the US to slander him... importing BBC clips to slander him... the endless slandering of National & ACT... the trite banter between presenters... reportage has become editorializing, editorializing has become social activism... schmaltzy 3-hanky hard-luck stories & the Janet MacIntyre-ification of NZ TV in general...

...should really mention Judy's $800K, yet strangely can't seem to get worked up over this overly generous use of my taxes. My extreme kuri-eats-kuri worldview dictates: if you can get it, go for it & good luck! But since we're in whinge mode, I'll include it... Judy's obscene salary...

But let's not dismiss ALL junk TV...
Discovered a fab noo reality show - The Next American Supermodel, or some such. A clutch of youthful belles duke it out to be voted 'Pretty Idol'. Perfectly conceived! The essence of great TV: stunning visuals (young models) & drama (chicks at each other's throats). From the brief glimpse I got: one was crying, another was laughing at her; a lezo came out, another was disgusted by it; the bully was about to be dealt to by the newly assertive & retributive victim; some were spying on others, others plotting, the rest just gossiping and complaining. All, however, keen to share most intimate thoughts with camera. All had superb body-language, throwing tantrums with elegant panache and style-y exquisite poses. All that in one segment between ads. Dontcha just love Hollywood crap? The Arabs do, apparently.

Retreat, ye foul Labour beasts!

The Socialist Party have stopped threatening Rodney Hide with Court action over alleged election over-spending. The whole accusation's a bit rich IMO considering Labour's no-holds-barred spend-fest, aspects of which 'thankfully' were ruled OK by speaker Madge Wilson. Besides, post-election litigation is NZF policy, not Labour's (eh Winny?). Rodney says:

"I know that Helen Clark & the Labour Party didn't want me back. Well they're going to have to get used to it."

Another reason to like him; he bugs the heck out of Labour (hehe). Confession: I feel I might be falling under the sway of cult-leader, Mr Hide. My mother warned me about weird, religious sects - but I fear we live in final days. The messiah a-cometh... and if it isn't the ACT leader himself, then it's probably - at least - one of his mates. Should the inexplicable urge to move to Epsom arise or I start prefacing all statements with, "Rodney says...," I'll seek de-programming :-)

Anyone else think Mike Williams is starting to look (physically) like a big, fat, sad, old prune? Not being horrible (I'm no Adonis myself ) just a personal aesthetic impression.

Good Lord! The end really is nigh...
Still recovering (smelling salts a'ready) from a HoS close-up on Bill English which speculates about a future stoush with Key to become Top Nat post-Don. Radically departing from tradition, a Tory is given (more or less) fair treatment - Had to read it 2x to be sure. It's no puff-piece, but lacks the usual smarm, sneering & sanctimony of our beloved 4th Estate. Where's the hard-left bias we know & love? Poor author, will probably get fired for this ;-) I like Bill's pragmatism:

"I wanted to make use of [my hard-won] experience... I've been through.. election victories.. losses.. leadership changes.. good policy.. bad policy.. And I'm young enough... to put that experience to use rather than throw it away"

This is nice:

"And anyway, what sort of example would that have set for the kids?
"Don't wallow in defeat, just getup and get stuck in again"

Amen! Saw him up close once at a march for Sensible Sentencing. Kudos to him for marching and addressing the crowd. I know he's a smart guy, conscientious, hardworking yada-yada, but observing him, I was struck by his extraordinary charisma-free personality. Perhaps, being Ngati, I'm used to hyper-theatricalism and mistake emotional restraint for character deformation:-) He just seemed so incredibly dispassionate. I'm being too kind, truth is he was friggin' BORING!

He appears a nice enough chap, a top bloke in fact, but major personality deficits hurt in election campaigns. Any media 'training' will make him seem phoney - a disaster since his most endearing quality is his simple, honest, down-to-earth, one-of-the-lads persona. His humility fits well with our 'egalitarian' psyche. John Key would thrash him in a personality contest. Don't worry, Bill. You can be still be Deputy PM, and should John accidentally suffer a mishap while out skydiving...

Nix it, Queen!

Sunday * Times reports Georgina Beyer's bill outlawing discrimination against transgender folk will not be revived after languishing in legal limbo since Parliament's election break. With heavyweights Clark and Cullen unsupportive, we can safely conclude it's a "no-goer." Georgie, unsurprisingly, is shattered and blames a "growing climate of intolerance in parliament & society." Increasing intolerance? I disagree. Having grown up in the 'homophobic' 70s/80s - contemporary NooZild is a Queer Paradise compared to days of yore. The slogan "We Are Everywhere" has become a mere statement of fact. Consider the following:

Pink TV: Queer Nation, Will & Grace, 6 Feet under, Takataapui, Queer eye et al.
Pink Poli's: Beyer, Carter, Barnett, Finlayson, Heather Simpson... Clark & Tizard ( snicker)
Pink Religion: Lesbian Ministers (Methodist & Presbetarian) Auckland's Anglican gay-for-all
Pink Education: Queer Studies at Unis, obligatory Q components in high school sex-ed curriculum

Georgie, Dahhling! We live in the gayest era in history. It's all become a bit much for those who Really Don't Care what others do in private. Even so, she acknowledges the resentment built up over the recent law changes to prostitution and civil unions.

"They want to appease the more conservative elements that have come to the fore in recent years"

Perhaps that's just the inevitable reaction from a majority who felt the CU & Hooking laws were foisted upon them in 'coming-ready-or-not' fashion. Personally, I objected mainly to the obscene haste of the bills' enactments. Rushed through the select committee; appallingly shoddy reasearch and dodgy stats presented without question as 'facts' by the proponents; dissenters ignored, ridiculed and marginalized - no way were moral & social conservatives, church folk, and other objecters given a fair hearing. Paradoxically, the opposing views of the so-called 'intolerant' folk were not tolerated. Sound fair? Social justice? You decide!

Remember also Chris Carter's vainglorious declaration, "I want to be the first (gay couple) to walk up the aisle..." (or something like that). It sounded like legislation being made at the behest of an MP's whim.

I concur with The Eradicator who says the T-bill is a prime example of PC gone mad; he's correct IMO to question why we need a special law for transgenders, i.e., surely all the 'rights' a Kiwi ever needs are enshrined in either the Bill Of Rights or existing Statutes.

Buh-bye, Ian?
Mr Fraser has offered to fall on his sword as chief of TVNZ. See ya! Bill Ralston, head of News (sic) & current affairs, is rumored to follow. Quinella! Bet Holmes and Richard Long - and Judy - are enjoying a quiet giggle.

Nastiness aside, seems there's a deep troubled and dysfunctional mood overhanging the broadcaster's newsrooms. I believe it's what's called "a sick culture" in the NZ journalist vernacular (eh, print media?) ;-) The panic is coz 24-54 yr old Auckland males are switching to TV3. News-wise, that's changing from left to lefter; like leaving Labour for the Greens. Oh well, at least Stephen Parker and John (I'm a lefty) Campbell are upfront about disfavouring National - they're 'honest' propagandists. I think maybe coz TV3's news is more Aucklo-centric, there's an element of 'viewer parochialism' at work here. A patriotic Wgtn-ian to the core, I still reckon Akld does deserve the lion share of the spotlight, simply coz it's BIG.

UPDATE: It's confirmed - He's resigned! Can't imagine Mr Ralston will enjoy trouble-free sleep for the next li'l while.

Just when you thought it was safe to be a kiwi kid again, the SST paints an apocalyptic vision of our rangatahi. Suicidal & miseducated, illegitimate & abused, overweight & broke (how do poor people get fat? if they can't afford to eat, that is... just wondering), our chil'n are inescapably doomed to lives of destitute horror as our disintegrating society plummets into the abyss of gross neglect, failure and abuse unparalled in any country or any time in history. Or so say various 'experts' as told by an alarmed SST scribe. It's amazing anyone makes it to adulthood intact anymore.

New Zealand 61 - Australia 36

Don't often see a trans-Tasman netball scoreline like that. A lot of history made tonight in Waitakare. NZ's biggest winning margin over Oz (previously 19). Irene van Dyke became the most capped player of all time (129) edging past England's Kenra Lowe. And skipper, Liz Ellis, became the most capped Ozzy player in history (105) overtaking legendary goal shooter and former team-mate Vicki Wilson, before she got injured in the 1st quarter. Vili Davu also collected her 100th cap tonight (and had a blinder!) What a hiding! Mmmm! Delectable!

UPDATE: Liz Ellis has torn her Anterior Cruciate Ligament (whatever that is) and will miss their tour of Jamaica.

quick flick thru the 'Auckland' Herald

Tertiary Institutions are looking to raise fees. Massey Uni (10% - Thwapp!) & the Colleges of Education in Chch & Dndn (5-10%). Enjoy that interest free loan, Labour-voting scholars! (chuckle).

Wayne Mapp seeks to "eradicate" the more draconian aspects of the smoke-free legislation. Not that it'll matter - Tariana, Pita (reformed smoker) and Hone (health-kickster) will demonstrate that "it's all about whanau" sometimes translates as "Nanny knows best" in Te Reo Maori Party. The left have the numbers, with 2 Nat Drs & a few NZFs to spare. Case closed, status quo remains.

Daily police-bashing article from the 'Auckland' Herald. Added interactive bonus: Extra-keen journos seek your feedback to help compile further pirihimana horror tales for later publication. Winning sob-story will be awarded the John Manukia Prize for whistle-blowing.

In a discussion on PC (sounds like the Poms have it bad in some places) kiwiblog gets a mention. Congrats, DPF! True to form, a few sentences are given to the "right-winger" (journo's own description), before allowing leftist moonbat law academic to lengthily elaborate on the merits of PC.

The long-suffering voice of public powhiri fatigue has spoken and the message is :

"take those protocols back home to where they belong"

Te Heu Heu & Henare korero in mince-free dialect. I love the way they talk over there. An incredibly brave & upfront thing to say, when ya think about it. Expect the word "kupapa" to be tossed around whenever G&T's names come up on Te Internet.

Oh, and Go, Silver Ferns!!

Labour land grab alert

Oh, no! The new Minister of Agriculture is sounding ominously acquisitive, revisiting Jim Sutton's awful Govt-theft of private land legislation. How creepy! Poor farmers. They must be spewing! I'd be! I am! This is similar to the horrendous Eminent Domain outrage in the US. This Mugabe-like State appropriation of other people's property Must Be Stopped!

How do the votes tally: LPG (57) + Dunne? Yikes, that's 60! He's in cahoots with the outdoor recreation crowd, i.e. spoiled brats with false sense of self-entitlement, stamping-feet about their imagined 'right' to roam all over other people's land! To think how much money gets wasted everytime search & rescue have to go look for these "lost" climbers, trampers and nature freaks.

Surely TMP will oppose this raupatu whenua? (4). Surely also Nat+Act (50). Winston, eh? If he votes "aye" then I take back everything I ever said about him being an awesome role model for our taitama tane. He voted 'ae' for the FS&SB bill - I've sorta forgiven him for that. But this new law is Simply Unthinkable. Do the Right Thing, Wini! Vote down this legislative abomination!

Puhleeze! Put it back on!

Disturbing murmurings from Canada about the current surge in popularity of do-it-yourself nude calendars in the Great White North. Oh, my! What an odd thing to do! Isn't it cold up there? Seems no one's immune - including kaumatua - ewww! [Kinda reminds me of the equally baffling & thankfully short-lived "get nekkid against the Iraq war" protest phenomenon.] What strange sociological forces could be at play here? Why the exhibitionist calendar fad? What could these pitiful lapses into undignified disrobing en masse signify? Have these women no shame?

More chillingly, could NZ be next? Could a similar outbreak of Mad Bird-of-the-month Flu erupt here? And what of the ghastly possibility that Parliament could become infected. Would God be cruel enough to smite us for our sins of mediocrity by punishing us with a "Babes of Labour 2005" edition? Imagine, if you dare:

Jan: Ms Wilson clad only in judge's wig, gavel aloft with reprimanding smirk
Feb: the voluptuous Ms Hobbes reclining with Rubensesque splendour
Mar: the eerily ambiguous Mr(s) Beyer bathed in the hazy red glow of a corner streetlamp
Apr: the cherubic Ms Mahuta coyly toying a tactfully placed ponga frond
May: a whip-cracking, studded-leather dominatrix Clark (that's not hard to imagine)
Jun: a lei-toting Ms Laban, flower in ear reposing topless in Gaugin's Sth Pacific paradise
Jul: an earnest-faced Ms King writhing playfully upon a scattered heap of speeding tickets
Aug: Ms Chadwick's scarlet pout drawing on lit ciggy against a backdrop of pint glasses
Sep: Ms Dalziel lying (in unison) on a guinea pig-skin rug
Oct: Heather Simpson beguiling us with her boyish come-hither gaze thru 2 inch lenses
Nov: wine rivulets glistening on Ms Dyson's bare skin, astride a crashed car
Dec: the skimpy pole of a union protest banner barely concealing Ms Street's nether-wheres

Help! I've gone blind!

Shalom!

Israel will re-open its NZ Embassy (closed since Oct. 2002) here in beautiful Wellington. That's a welcome announcement from our Minister of Racing. I'm happy; never a good idea to get offside with God's chosen iwi.

One might have hoped that Winny would've been equally vociferous as his opposite number in condemning the crazy Iranian prez who calls for Israel's annihilation. Alas, he offers up a gutless mouthful of diplomatic blithering that's almost an apologia for the Palestinians - it bugs me no end that we just gave $1 mil of "aid" to those nutcases. He labels Ahmadinejad's vicious diatribe "unhelpful" to the M.E. peace process. Unhelpful? I'd say it's a casus belli if ever I heard one, subscribing as I do to the "Nuke 'em before they nuke you" doctrine of foreign relations. Rodney Hide's description of Peters (& Dunne) as Helen's ''neutered poodle(s)" seems ever more apt.

Oh, so that's why...
The NBR links to a Teletubby spiel (Nov. 2004) about the trade & diplomatic history between the Islamic Republic and our own Socialist Godzone. Still, my most immensely dashed hopes with this new, lame, tame man-on-world stage version of Winny. I expected the pugilist headliner of old. The upgraded Winston-lite has as much bite as a paper marionette; with about as much autonomy, too.

He's baaack!

Ex-NZFirst, ex-Mauri Pacific, current-Nat MP makes a colourful splash on his return to the Beehive. He wants to disconnect the 0800 POWHIRI service. Looks like he's been chatting with Wayne Mapp going over Don's Orewa 1 speech ;-) Nonetheless, he's absolutely correct to observe that:

"Labour continually uses and abuses Maori values whenever it suits them"

Pity the majority on the Maori electoral roll don't realise this on election day. There's a reason Maori don't win Nobel Prizes. Phil Goff's (decontextualised) statement that karakia are used as,

"promotional gimmicks to attract media attention in foreign countries"

is rather curious, but doesn't at all surprise me. Nothing Labour does, anymore. Tell us more, Mr Henare! Korero mai! Always quite liked Tau. Like the erstwhile Mr Tamihere, he truly understands (firsthand) and can articulate the daily concerns, aspirations and frustrations of the constituency vaguely known as "mainstream" [Nat-speak] urban Maori. At least those of us fed up with the shortcomings (read: incompetence & dishonesty) rife in so many of our runanga and roopu awhina [YOU know who you are!] Gawd, I'm startin' to sound like Alan Duff. Must be getting old. Maybe soon I'll be eligible to conduct traditional welcoming rituals for official visitors : -)

Hope Tau makes heaps o' noise this term and continues in John's footsteps, especially his expose of the inner machinations of the Labour Machine ala the Investigate magazine interview. Ka pai, John! Your most significant contribution to kiwi political discourse, ever! Never mind that it was unintentional :-)

Wonder how palsy things'll be between Tau & Winny? Other than that they're in different parties, and in opposition (or whatever it is that Winston calls it). 'Tis a cryin' shame things never worked out for them in 1996-99. "Oh, nostalgia! You've changed so much since then."

Old Commies never die
Speaking of reminiscences going awry, in a completely unnecessary flash of retro-feelgood activism, Grant Morgan (secretary of Auckland's Socialist Worker), Matt McCarten (Union cheerleader) & John Minto (uber-protestor) are mission bound. Like a grotesque parody of those Hippy Bus Tour things from a sillier generation, the tiresome trio are out to impress their collaborative brainchild, "The Workers Charter," on an unsuspecting poor, exploited, kiwi proletariat.

Greedy capitalist dogs, be warned! The workers have nothing to lose but their chains. Hedonists lament! This time around the 'sex, drugs, rock n roll' will be replaced by the infinitely less groovy 'worker's struggle'. Have fun, comrades.

Poor, deluded Mr Morgan typically miscasts The Maori Party as left of Labour -- an all too common fault of msm journos, IMO. Imagine his dismay on discovering they're pro-tax cut, pro-life, believe families (not guvmints) should bring up kids, despise centralised governance, and -horror of all horrors- are respectful of Christianity.

misleading headline du jour

The Herald sreams "Maori crime rate concerns Government." On closer inspection, we see plus ca meme... Half the prison population is Maori (non-news) as are 45% serving community-based sentences. That last figure represents a drop. Throughout almost all of the 1990s, ('89-98) the rate of Maori sentencing, i.e. the total count of all sentences imposed by the Courts, exceeded that of non-Maori in all of the eight categories of Crime (as defined by the Justice Dept & excluding traffic offences where 'race/ethnicity' isn't recorded) except for Drug Offences. In other words, Maori comprised 50% or more of all offenders sentenced in every year of that decade. Now we're only 45% (at least in the comm-based sentences). Remember also that the Maori population has grown proportionately to the Whole of NZ since the 1990s, so the decrease to the current 45% level is even sweeter. That's pleasing news. Kia ora!

CRIME TRENDS: In the 12 months to June 2005

• 7.1% reduction across all offences
• police resolution of crimes stable at 44.2%
• 40% of prison population are violent offenders *
  
• dishonesty offences make up 60% of all crime **
  
• marginal reduction in family violence***
• vehicle crime nearly 18% of all reported crime ****
  

* Numbers include sexual violence
** Half of these are theft & burglary
*** Estimated levels of incidents not reported, a "key concern."
**** High by overseas standards. Also, theft of/from cars significantly under-reported.

The Eradicator married a Maori Person! Or so says Don Brash while commenting on Wayne Mapp's new PC-eliminator role. For the record, Mrs Denise Henare is a she-person. A barrister, too, so let's have no dumb Maori jokes ;-) it wouldn't be PC, after all... I say more power to Wayne, and hope his attacks on the Human Rights Commission are unrelenting, particularly its emphasis on 'advocacy' [which is gummint-speak for 'doing all you can to assist the Labour Party'].

Hurricane Harriet dissipates
And what a ferocious storm it was! I've never seen such Republican & conservative fury (from some quarters) over President Bush's nomination of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court. I've always been of the mind that the nominee is the prerogative of the POTUS and no one else. That's something I still maintain. I'll leave it at that. I continue to support the President, regardless. Now that she has withdrawn I hope the GOP can prepare for the 2006 mid-term elections - after recovering from the coming storm over the next nominee, that is. Don't put away your raincoats yet, folks!

National's new line up

National's shadow Cabinet:

1. Don Brash - Leader, SIS, Relationships with non-govt parties; 2. Gerry Brownlee - Deputy leader, shadow leader of the House, Treaty of Waitangi isssues & Maori affairs; 3. Bill English - Education, deputy finance; 4. John Key - Finance; 5. Nick Smith - Environment/RMA, energy, building & construction, caucus rep on the National Party Board; 6. Tony Ryall - Health; 7. Simon Power - Law & Order (police & corrections); 8. Judith Collins - Welfare, veteran's affairs, family affairs, liaison with Pacific Islanders; 9. Katherine Rich - Economic development, SOEs, liaison with youth; 10. David Carter - Agriculture, tourism; 11. Murray McCully - Foreign affairs & trade, defence, conservation, sport and recreation; 12. Lockwood Smith - Immigration, revenue, assc finance, liaison with ex-pats; 13. Maurice Williamson - Transport, communication & information, technology; 14. Wayne Mapp - Labour & industrial relations, political correctness eradication [smirk, big approving grin], chair of caucus policy committee; 15. Richard Worth - Justice, assc local govt (Auckland); 16. Lindsay Tisch - Chief whip, racing; 17. Tim Groser - Arts, culture & heritage, assc foreign affairs and trade; 18. Chris Finlayson - Attorney-General, assc Treaty & Maori affairs (negotiations), assc arts, culture and heritage; 19. John Carter - Local govt, civil defence; 20. Pansy Wong - assc education (international), assc immigration, assc revenue, liaison with Asian NZers; 21. Georgina te Heu Heu - Broadcasting, assc defence, assc Treaty & Maori affairs (development); 22. Paul Hutchison - ACC, disability issues, research, science & technology/CRIs, policy on children; 23. Shane Arden - Fisheries, customs, biosecurity, liaison with rural communities; 24. Phil Heatley - Housing, assc energy, assc fisheries; 25. Tau Henare - assc Treaty & Maori affairs (negotiations), assc education (early childhood); 26. Sandra Goudie - Senior citizens, internal affairs, assc local govt; 27. Brian Connell - Forestry, commerce, consumer affairs, statistics.

Key Matchups: Key vs Cullen (finance), English vs Maharey (education), Power vs King (police), Ryall vs Hodgson (health), McCully vs Winny (foreign affairs - should be a hoot). The two young-buck AGs could be an interesting tussle, too. Oh, and Wayne "The Exterminator" Mapp vs LPG & the Maori Party! Should be fun.

Woe is me (and all the cuzzies)

The Education Review Office reports its dismal findings. Shock, horror, there are disparities between our best and worst students. Maori & PI kids lag behind. Experts predict a frightful problem in future. Sounds all rather familiar, dunnit? Most scarily, the ERO insists school must improve not only their literacy & numeracy, but also "cultural awareness." Sure hope the Polynesians fail all that multi-culti diversity goo they dish out in the classroom. Maharey, the Minister of Dithering, promises more policies such as (1) seeing what good schools do to achieve success, & (2) trying to implement it at lesser achieving schools. I remain resolutely non-assuaged. Expect tons of 'reports' and 'enquiries' and 'new committees'.

UPDATE: The school teachers hit back. Take that, ERO! About time someone fronted up to the increasing busy-bodyness of this out-of-control, unaccountable, bureaucratic quagmire that strangles and mangles all in its PC path. All the ERO ever does is moan, moan, moan. They bowl into a school, criticize it to bits, write a (usually condemnatory) report, then move along to the next sucker. I can't remember one instance of them offering any sound advice or solutions for all of the 'problems' they routinely discover. Spraying criticism machine-gun style on hapless school 'targets' is a hopeless and dispiriting practice that crushes teaching staff's enthusiasm and lowers community morale. For all the talk of 'the importance of self-esteem' and 'safe environments' the educrats peddle, they behave in a most bullying, intimidatory, and insensitive manner.

UPDATE II: The Libertarianz are even less sympathetic.

"Bugger the teachers, bugger the schools and bugger ERO"

...suggests an educational spokesman. Pithy indeed! Tell us how you really feel!

Depressing Stat-Watch: Maori account for 15% - 20% of AIDS cases. Since that's about the same proportion of the population in general, so what? An Auckland Uni researcher tells us that since Maori women have higher HIV rates than the blokes, we can expect more wahine in future to have AIDS than men. Such dazzling acumen! He lists socioeconic status, a 'racist' health system and lack of condoms as aggravating causes. I thought it was the shagging.

But all is not gloom. The Health Ministry announces that although Maori, Pacific, and Poor People still have higher suicide, smoking and infant death figures, the national numbers are dropping as a whole (including MPPPs). Something to be glad for, I guess.

Spectacular late-spring in Wellington

A gorgeous sunny day in the Capital. The air trills with birdsong; flowers pose languid & immodest; warm breezes caress with a thousand whispery kisses. Am I on drugs? In love? Insane? No, I've been reading poetry, or rather, Camille Paglia interpretations in her choice new book Break, Blow, Burn. 43 poems from Shakespeare to Joni Mitchell are given la Paglia treatment. A very enlightening and inspired book, especially for us folk whose appreciation of lyricism extends only as far pop tunes.
But is it art? Believe it or not, this is a poem! (seriously!!)

'The Red Wheelbarrow'
by Carlos Williams

so much depends
upon
a red wheel
barrow
glazed with rain
water
beside the white
chickens

It may, initially, seem like a pile of pathetic, minimalist, airy-fairy, arty-farty, head-up-backside, wankiness; like an ad jingle that doesn't even rhyme. But Paglia shows there's gold in them thar' piffle! Here's her very imaginative and inspired reading of it.

The liars respond

After months of sending "hate mail" online to the NZ Herald, I finally got a reply (I listed "Auckland" as my place of residence, perhaps that's why). Jeremy Rees, assistant ed, responds to my complaint of journalistic fraud:

I have forwarded it to the Herald on Sunday and its editor Shayne Currie. Mr Manukia worked for the Herald on Sunday, a separate paper to the New Zealand Herald.

Quick to distance themselves from their fellow rogues, aren't they? Manukia-gate must really be sticking in their craw, I've never seem them so apologetic.

Meanwhile, the liar-in-chief himself is contrite, or in his own words: "flabbergasted", "astounded", "disappointed", and "appalled." I experience all those emotions myself - everytime I read his gawd-awful paper. He assures us that,

99.9% of journalists are honest and ethical

Hmmm... so it must be the proof-readers that insert all those fabrications in our newspapers, huh? In the 'redundancy of the year', Jim Tully (head of PolSci & communications at Canterbury Uni) goes on to tell us that lying...

undermines and destroys the credibility of not only the individual journalist but the media organisation

No kidding? He finishes with the good news that...

The professional status of journalists is not high in the public mind and we tend to finish up in surveys down there with used car salesmen

That's a bit hard on the vendors of second-hand vehicles, I reckon.

Sobering commentary on local TV talent

A fabulously scathing assessment of our current crop of homegrown celebs at the Star-Times. Who is this author? Where did he learn to write like this? I want what he's having!

Dipsy wimmin's film-maker, Niki Caro, laments that kiwis fail to appreciate Aotearoa's abundant creative geniuses becoz of our "Colonial mentality." Gee, I thought it was our low tolerance for pitiful crap dressed-up as art! When the white folk start talking about "Colonialism" like it's a bad thing, you know you're in trouble! By the way, Niki - Shut up!

Manukia-gate?

Doesn't really have a ring to it, does it? Still, I'm overjoyed the msm is having a Rathergate meltdown moment, and STILL they stubbornly insist on the Big Bad Cop theme! NZCity pipes up with a reminder about the "alleged brutality" leading to Mr Solomona's dismissal. And in a brief report TV One makes sure to repeat the absurd lie about a "sick culture" among CM police.

Over in Ozzy, Sydneysiders are calling our Winny "controversial", "outspoken", and a "maverick leader." They must have met him in person ;-) Our first Maori Deputy Prime-Minister (Ta Apirana, notwithstanding), Treasurer, and Foreign Minister says the restoration of ANZUS is his #1 priority... and we need Alex Downer (bludging off the Ozzies again) to help us grease up to the 'Mericans. Good luck! Until there's a powhiri for the next US warship to visit Wellington harbour, I suspect Mr Bush's enthusiasm for Noo Zild will remain disinterestedly unkindled.

Prayers for Phil Kearns, wife Julie, & kids, that their critically injured 19-month old daughter recovers in hospital after he run her over (dopey bugger) in his driveway yesterday. Get well soon, Andie! xxx

Left-wing Crybaby Alert: The Greens are still mulling around in post-coalition negotiation gloom. Rod Donald sulks:

"I don't want to die wondering whether I've got the capacity to be a good minister. I won't say I'm in no hurry but we'll bide our time."

Don't hold ya breath, Rod! Unless you score a high ranking on Labour's list (plus Helen's approval, of course) ;-)

Meanwhile, the Last Cab off the Rank may have their first opportunity to veto the reintroduction of the 'waka-jumping' bill, which has expired. Currently the numbers stack up:

For: Labour (50), Progressives (1), NZ First (7) = 58
Against: National (48), ACT (2), Greens (6) United (3) = 59

So the Maori Party's 4 votes may swing it unless Peter Dunne offers support. It would be perfect time for Tariana to say "no" and exact utu from Helen & Winny for the Seabed and Foreshore Act. She could hardly say "yes" being a waka-jumper, herself. Mind you, the same could also be said for Jim, Winny, and the MP for Ohariu-Belmont. Who knows which way the hau will blow? Must be nice to be able to indulge in a spot of tail-dog-wagging, ne? ;-)

All Blacks named

The squad for the grand-slam tour of Great Britain & Ireland named this morning.

Five newcaps: Masoe, Eaton, Tialata, MacDonald, Toeava.
Out: Marty Holah, Corey Flynn.
Recalled: Andrew Hore, Nick Evans

NB: there are SEVEN Brave Wellington Lions vs. only 6 Cantabs in the squad :-)
Altogether a good geographic spread IMO. Good on Auckland (I very rarely say that) for winning the NPC!

North Harbour; Tony "The Man" Woodcock
Auckland; John Afoa, Doug Howlett, Angus Macdonald, Keven Mealamu, Mils Muliaina, Joe Rokocoko, Isaia Toeava, Mose Tuiali'i, Ali Williams
Waikato; Sitiveni Sivivatu, Byron Kelleher, Sione Lauaki
Taranaki; Jason Eaton, Andrew Hore, Chris Masoe
Wellington; Jerry Collins, Ma'a Nonu, Conrad Smith, Rodney So'oialo, Neemia Tialata, Tana Umaga (captain), Piri Weepu
Nelson Bays; Rico Gear
Canterbury; Richie McCaw, Dan Carter, Chris Jack, Leon MacDonald, Aaron Mauger, Greg Somerville
Otago; Anton Oliver, James Ryan, Carl Hayman, Nick Evans
Southland; Jimmy Cowan

Clark admits anti-nuke stance bad for NZ-US relationship

The Sydney Morning Herald has Helen Clark admitting our anti-nuke laws are a huge obstacle to good US relations. The quotes are remarkably frank:

"It has been something everyone would like to deal with but New Zealand can't deal with it under a Labour government, certainly can't deal with it with Winston Peters as foreign minister, because we are of one mind on this. "We can't deal with it by changing the nuclear-free law - we happen to believe in it."

Oh, well... Roll on, next National Govt, I s'pose. I bet this story won't see much light in the kiwi MSM. This article was linked at the US news website, Lucianne.com- and it won't help foster pro-kiwi sentiment among our American visitors. And we wonder why tourist numbers from the States have been declining in recent times. Hello? Mike Basset? Fran O'Sullivan? Auckland Chamber of Commerce? NZ Tourism? Is anyone listening? Can anyone connect the dots...?

Anti-cop Journalist Busted

Herald on Sunday senior journalist with 15 years experience, John Manukia, got snapped big-time for fabricating quotes of non-existent interviews with ex-Counties Manukau cop, Anthony Solomona, in his news articles published last week. Take that you slimey little A-hole! I'm glad the journos-for-jihad against the coppers are becoming exposed for the fraudulent, agenda driven, left-wing activist idiots that they are. (Wonder if the NZ Herald and Stuff will try & bury this story? Wonder if it's got legs? NBR... are you paying attention?

Shame on the Herald! Shame on editor, Shayne Currie! Shame on the kiwi MSM!

UPDATE: Stuff have an abbreviated version of Manukia's sacking. The Herald on Sunday have published an apology and retraction:

The Herald on Sunday apologises to Mr Anthony Solomona and retracts statements said to have been made by him in an article published on October 16, 2005...

Not enough! I want blood!! :-)
Editor publishes a lame, whiney defence of journos (snicker!) and sneakily tries to shift attention to the indiscretions of various US journalists. What can you say? Anti-American to the bitter end.

Have we got a Govt yet?

I like Tom Scott's take on coalition negotiations with the Maori Party - LOL! Perfect!

Do I detect panic at the NZ Press Assn's offices? Pondering the unthinkable? A National led Govt? While trying to put on a brave face for Helen, the sniping at the Nats has already begun, questioning Murray McCully's influence over the Don. We don't even have a gubbermint yet, and the Labour Party, oops... I mean the mainstream media, has reverted to default conservative-bashing mode.

D'ya think it grows on trees, or something!?
Queen Helen wastes more money doling out the 3rd annual round of "Prime Minster's Prizes." No prizes for guessing the recipents: 2 wimmin, both Wellington bureaucrats; a social policy analyst and an ex-trade unionist. What a surprize!

Not a headline you see every day...
"Police nab arsonist dwarf after taxi bid for freedom"

10% truancy rate for schoolkiddies
Education Ministry research shows 1 in 10 kids missing from school each day. Higher rates for boys at co-ed schools; Maori & PI kids double everyone else. Not at all fazed by those figures. With the amount of crap they teach at the indoctrination factories these days (ecology, diversity, Heather's three mommies, etc), it's quite possibly a good thing. One tenth are lucky enough to escape the socialist brainwashing. Does this mean we get a 10% reduction on our school fees?

Good on ya, Greg!

Good to see the NZ Police Assn get its bite back. Delighted to read president, Greg O'Connor, rightfully lambasting Judge Davidson's way out-of-line criticism of Counties-Manukau cops.

"Judges and others in influential positions need to be very aware that such accusations made publicly will attract considerable and negative media attention."

Go get him, Greg! Pompous, blow-hard, know-nothing black-robed cretins should lend their expertise to the legalistic arguments before them and refrain from offering subjective (and extraneous) assessments about complex sociological matters outside of their juridiction and experience. Maybe Da Judge needs to spend a few shifts with the frontline CM officers policing the badlands of South Auckland (yuck!!) The Police Assn are writing to demand a public apology. Can I sign that letter, too? With a postscript suggesting the smug, incestuous, insular environment of the NZ judiciary is itself conducive to a "Sick Culture."

A pox, also, on the mainstream media -- most notably The NZ Herald & The Dominion Post -- for their excessive, overblown, hysterical highlighting of police failures. Phil Kitchener needs to burn in hell for initiating this jihad against the coppers. What's the matter, Phil? Get a speeding-ticket?

Te Kupu Tuatahi

He honore he kororia ki te Atua
He maungarongo ki te whenua
He whakaaro pai ki nga tangata katoa

E nga tini aitua kua wheturangihia
Haere atu ki te po
Moe mai, takoto mai

Ki a tatou te hungaora
nga hau e wha
nga pito o te motu
nga iwi o te ao katoa
Tena rawa atu tatou katoa!

Ko Hikurangi te Maunga
Ko Waiapu te Awa
Ko Ngati Porou te iwi

Tihei Mauriora!

Ko Piripi tenei (ko "Phil" ranei)
e noho mai nei ki Poneke, ara,
ko Te Whanganui-a-Taranihoniho,
ko Te Upoko o te Ika a Maui.

Nau mai, hara mai [ Ngati Porou dialect :-) ] ki aku tuhituhi!