Tuesday, December 20, 2005

stupid apes

shouldn't really bag a Kiwi Superstar, but...
"King Kong falling off Empire State Building" - What a perfect metaphor for Pete Jackson's plummet from hero-dom to splattered ruins, IM Nat-voting O. After witnessing his staunch Labour election campaigning, most glad that Fat-Hog's movie is bombing (yes, I know he's a lot slimmer nowadays, I meant 'fat-hog' as a general term of abuse). As for his severely homely & TreliseCooper-like territorial-name-hugging wife (eh, Listener columnist?) why not do a remake of Charlotte's Web and make her the pig? They'll be snow storms in Hades before I give Mr & Mrs Fat Repulsive Slovenly Socialist Porkers Both-of-Them one cent o' mah money!

prayers answered
Heroic & death defying tale of survival at sea for two brave, unlucky Anzacs enduring hellish 11 day (& night) ordeal, south of Hong Kong, clinging to raft, with just a paddle & sponge. This is one of those "we had to drink our own mimi" yuck-but-true
near-death against-all-odds superhuman-will-to-survive yarns. Tumeke!
"After 3 days, the rains stopped, leaving only winds that.. never dropped below 65km/h..Every day, the raft was flipped & flipped again"
Welcome ashore, boys! Amazing courage! Hats off! Thank you, Vietnamese fishermen! Thank you, Tangaroa! Thank you, baby Jesus! Bet this is their Best. Christmas. Ever.

stunning statistics stating kiwi kids are geeky kids, theese dweeb figures must make tasty reading for greedy, unbundled Telecom with its monopolistic eye on future patronage:
  • 30% of 6-8 yr olds use net
  • 74% of 9-17 have surfed longer than 2 years
  • kids as young as 4 yrs old use net
  • 75% log on at least once per week
  • 50% kids go online every day
  • Average kid spends 4.7 hours p/w online
  • 15-17 yr olds spend 8 hours p/w
Betcha next generation will lead world in: short-sightedness & vision problems; repetitve strain injuries in fingers & hands, shoulders & necks; bad posture & sedentary related disorders; real-life social interactive dysfunctionalism; & reallee badd speling.

Te Maori News
Three old whare, recently unearthed on mid-city Wgtn site, to be preserved. Thought to be remnants of Te Aro Pa at "Pigeon Park." Bound to be stacks of archaeologia along Taranaki St route all the way to Pukeahu Pa (Old Museum/War Memorial).* Pity its such a heavy traffic artery - all historical artefacts will likely never see light of day through the constant haze of exhaust fumes.

* Those towering monuments of classical architecture now outrageously gobbled up pac-man style by the voracious, ravenous Massey Uni. Does any major piece of Capital's real estate NOT belong to a University? No wonder fees are sky-rocketing! Friggin' 3ry ed institutions are buying up the town. Even our beloved Cake Tin is emblazoned with Otago Uni's logo! Freakin' scarfies! Go back home to your desolate, Antarctic wasteland where your brain-frozen electorate can endure that lying, tennis-ball stuffing, bully-boy bald old fool you voted for.

Attention numerologists: This is my 108th post. 108 = Very Special Number in maths & eastern religions - is divisible by 1,2,3,4,6,9,12,18,27,36,54 & itself. Must be something deeply significant in all that... what? not too sure, but there ya go... Amazing & Incredible...

that name rings a belle...
I remember latest Labour Minister's assault victim, Madeleine Flannagan, from back in the day @ Waikato Uni... Her + co-RightWingConspirators, Ben King, deputy Rick & the VSM lads... So she's still stickin' it to the silly socialists (onya, Mads!). Shoulda got martial-arts exponent (& very snappy dresser) hubby, Matt, to defend honour & fell the Hodgson beast. And surely a wiley old veteran student pol like yourself oughta know Helen's Hounds have legal immunity. Good to see you won the Moral Victory, anyway! Cheers, Mrs F!


Gary Freedman said...

Greetings from the USA.

phil said...

Hi Gary! Salutations to all in the Land of the Free! - even the John Kerry voters ;-)

God Bless our most highly esteemed & excellent President George W. Bush! the Greatest American in History (imho).


Kiwis For Bush!

noizy said...

Fat-Hog's movie is bombing...

#1 at the US box office? It's recouped nearly a quarter of its cost in 3 days of screening, and it's a bomb?

phil said...

Yeah, I take your point JG.

But... there's still time for it to bomb 'properly' (fingers crossed) ;-)
IM Nasty, but hopeful O

Madeleine said...

LOL! I doubt I will ever stop sticking it to socialists!