Saturday, December 03, 2005


what did we do to deserve it?
Doom-laden announcement that cloying Wendy Petrie's back to worsen our already dreadful evening news. With all the TVNZ brouhaha about trimming the sole presenter's salary, what do they do? They go and hire TWO presenters. I'm not an accountant, but isn't that dumb? Like, more expensive?
S'pose it coulda been worse. Coulda had Walrus moustache or Linda Clarke or Kim Hill. My personal hell would be being in confined space with Sainsbury, Clarke & Hill all blathering simultaneously about how amazing PM Helen is.

Also glad after entire tenure producing a torrent of vacuous, unwatchable fluff, news exec Melanie Griffith realised her true vocation is women's mags. At least the weeklies don't take themselves seriously and pretend to be factual or impartial.

Maori cop lucky not to be jailed for dealing P. Should know better, P's the scourgiest of them all! Should also come up with better alibis.
After confiscating residue in bags, he innocently claims he:
"forgot to dispose of them & rediscovered them in his pocket when he got home"
Where he found people wanting to score drugs from the home of a police officer. Hmm, accidents do happen I guess, let's give him benefit of doubt. At least he's remorseful:

"I'd like to apologise to the Sth Auckland police for making their name look like mud"
Why not apply for a job at the NZHerald? They've been doing it for months.

Jones' post-mortem
Eddie admits he's crap. His record against Proper rugby nations; Poms, Frogs, Jaaps & ABs, a miserable 14 wins out of 36. What a horrendous '05 season, 1 from 9. Imagine that happening to us! Our whole nation would disintegrate & never recover.

Not meaning to pick on the Herald or anything, but isn't 36 words a wee little bit short for an article.
It's barely an elaborated headline. I know how Hard it is to write a Whole Paragraph, so I do sympathise. But if not too exhausted, could pithy pensmen at least leave byline, so we know whom to attribute such masterpieces.

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