Monday, February 27, 2006

Nordic nirvana

Blonde is beautiful
New evolutionary research could confirm what lechers & aesthetes have always known and Hollywood has long suspected; blokes prefer blondes. Fair hair supposedly arose as a genetic mutation in cave-dwelling days during times of male scarcity. With so many men having perished on perilous hunting expeditions, the allure of a flaxen mop gave early European women a competitive advantage in mate selection - heart-stirring standouts among bromidic brunettes & rampant ravens. Alas, a WHO study predicts the defunctness of natural blondes within 200 years as the bleach gene recedes to extinction. Thank goodness we'll always have peroxide.

Looks aren't everything
While blondness may confer sex appeal, it's no guarantee of mental acuity. Perhaps the 'dumb' jokes were right? A most telling example is David Beckham who struggles to help 6 year old son with homework. Among the brain teasers to have stumped the golden-locked one:
"Bet went to the shop at 11.45. She came back half an hour later. What time did she come back?" and "What is 12 divided by three?"
The strain of fame, riches, a beautiful wife and soccer captaincy compounded by burdensome intellectual challenges preceding every match:
"was it the left side... the left boot I put on first, or the right side? There are so many things that can go through your mind"
Oh well... Don't worry Becks. Ignorance is bliss, as they say - you should be ecstatic! And while you may not possess the most attractive brain, the packaging it comes in is more impressive than most.

1 comment:

Rob Good said...

Is his wife any smarter?